Couples go through many major decisions in a marriage such as, opening joint accounts, buying a house, and having children. Another decision that should not be taken lightly is whether they should get a divorce.
Divorce is a Difficult Decision
There are many reasons why couples decide to divorce. No matter what the reason, it is difficult to know if the marriage can be saved or if there are no other options but to end it. Many people question whether they have done everything they could have to save their marriage. Couples will take many steps along the way to work on repairing the marriage, including counseling and self-help books.
After every effort has been made and there is no hope of saving the marriage, couples often make the decision to go through with a divorce.
Signs Couples Need a Divorce
There are some signs that point to the fact that divorce may be the only option:
- The certainty that you are better off without the other person
- The marriage is one-sided
- Staying married for the children
- Counseling has not worked
- One or both parties are being physically or mentally abused
- Staying in the marriage is an easier option than getting divorced
- Loss of respect for, or trust in, a spouse
- Staying married is cheaper than getting divorced
- Worry about what people will think
Dealing with Emotions
Many emotions are involved in making this decision. These emotions run from anger to confusion to fear to even relief. Once couples can move beyond these emotions, they are able to work with the decision that is ultimately needed.
New Roles for Parents
If there are children involved in the divorce, it is crucial to understand that there will be new roles for the parents. Co-parenting is something that must be thought out and planned. The children should always come first in this decision-making process.
How to Move Forward
Once the decision to divorce has been made, it is time to seek out a professional to keep things as equitable as possible. There are many paths to divorce and choosing the right one can make the difference between how simple or complex the matter will be. In New Jersey, for example, mediation is a mandated first step in the divorce process.